We’ve all done it. Asked for direction in the face of decisions, only to hear silence. So we keep moving forwards, and trust simply that God will close the doors if it’s not what He wills. We even ask “Please, if your plan is something other, then please would you close the doors, would you stop this happening“.
I myself have been using that line recently.
“God, I’m going to start the process of getting this new treatment, but if it’s not what you want, please stop it being able to happen, close this door”
“God I’m going to apply for this job, I really don’t know if it’s what’s best or not, but I trust you do, so if it’s not part of the good plan you have, then close the door”
“God, I’m going to plan to go away in April, I don’t now if the timing is right or not, if it’s not, please close that door.”
We ask it, we mean it, we trust that He will guide us in the right ways, and we trust that His plan and His timing is so much better.
But, how do we react when the door gets closed? When he takes us at our word and closes the door he doesn’t want us to walk through?
I’ve had a few doors slammed in my face the past couple of weeks. They’ve left me a little stunned, a little disappointed, they’ve left me feeling a bit hurt. No new treatment, no job, no travel away. I feel at peace knowing beyond doubt that my Father has got a purpose in this, and knowing that He’ll never leave me, and knowing that He’ll carry me through it all, peace. Yet still there is that lack of understanding, and that deep heart-cry of “why?”
While I was working my mind around it, pouring out my heart to my God and saviour. He simply replied with “You gave me permission to close those doors, you asked me to close them if it’s what I wanted, so I did.”
Ouch. Truth. I asked Him to do this, I gave Him permission to close those doors.
So how do I respond? With cries of “It’s not fair! I don’t want this!”? Or with praise, with words that say “Thank you, thank you for not letting me walk down the second-best road, thank you for closing the door you didn’t want me to walk though. Thank you for proving, again, that you are faithful, and you are trustworthy“?